Aurora9912

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Yay!  We've got the money to pay for surgery #1.  Yes, it sucks that I'm asking for more, but after surgery #2 (4 implants in top jaw), we should be done!  You notice I say "should"...I despise liars and if something comes up, we all know my "luck", I don't want to look like I lied.

All notes below are from gofund.me/LoriLife, my latest update.  You will see prime examples of my version of luck a couple of times at least.  (I'm trying to not think about it right now.)  Honestly, after I posted it-it goes to Facebook, Twitter, and then e-mails sent to people who have signed up for notices-I read it again and almost deleted it.  The damned thing is a giant pity party!  I left it up because the things that have happened are so very WRONG, and it's infuriating.  You'll see that I'm having a hard time and I'm sorry.  I truly appreciate you reading this, and please, if possible, could you SHARE my campaign on your media sites?  Everything helps.  I'll let you go now.  I wish you all very merry holidays and a new year that is spectacular!  Thanks again for lending me some of your time to read my story. 🐺

COPIED FROM MY CAMPAIGN ON GoFundMe!
[[Before I begin, did you know that you can enter your e-mail address here and you'll get all updates? I was kind of surprised to see that only 3 people signed up for this! I also found another section that showed we have NEVER had a donation that was triggered by a shared post. Please, could you share for me? I hate that I have to do this. You must understand that. If I had any other options I would take advantage of them. If I am able to get the money due to me, we will be almost done. But until then, I need your help. I am sorry to bother you, thank you.]]

Hi everyone,
(Sorry, edited & reposted! ✋)
I know that it has been a while but life has not been fun and I didn't want to spread the blues. Yes, I am still needing donations for that second surgery, $8,000. Please, SHARE this post, and thank you. A lot of stuff has happened. My oral surgery is delayed until after the New Year thanks to some female health issues that popped up. I am probably looking at surgery for that as well. I should probably just say definitely looking at surgery for that. Anyway, I think you already know that I lost my father in April. My "stepmother", if you want to call her that, has done some questionable things and through her attorney, that her daughter works for, they found a legal loophole that allows her to steal my inheritance from me. Which she did. It was $7,500, which if you note you will see is almost the entire amount that would have paid for my second surgery, which is what I believe Dad was going for. When you sign to be an executor the definition of EXECUTOR states that it is a "legal and moral obligation to fulfill the wishes of the decedent". Well, she is supposed to be a good Catholic church woman yet apparently morals are maybe not something they consider in that church? I don't know. What I do know is that I'm going to keep trying to get it. I have been so stressed, things have been happening one after another, piling up on me, and I find myself just sitting back unable to do anything. My mind goes round and round and I can't seem to move forward. I did also get my truck from Dad. The papers were actually done by her so it's in my name. Dad gave it to me years ago, we just never got around to doing the papers. Unfortunately, my sister believes that it should be hers and refuses to give it to me! I have given her numerous opportunities, I have asked politely, I have done everything I can and the only option left per the police is to have her arrested for auto theft. Which I am going to do. That may seem cold but if you knew our history you would agree. She has always thought that she could take from me whatever she wanted. And never pay anything back. I'm done with that. I'm done with them. My friends are my family. It's a much happier family. And I am very content with that. Actually it's a huge weight off of my shoulders.
The guy's just left after fixing my recliner for the third time in 3 days-not their fault. We are waiting on a whole new mechanism. The broken part was crushing the remote cord so the electric recliner kept cutting out.
As you can see, life is not full of smiles. I skipped Thanksgiving-hey, the smell of meat cooking makes me nauseous! I did have pumpkin pie, of course. And I have mashed potatoes and rolls if I get in the mood to eat them. This time of year is bad for me, has been for a couple of decades or so. I tend to hibernate, hence saving the world from having to tolerate me. My bright light this year is my friend Gina. She helps me with everything, gets my groceries, takes me to the dentist, whatever. I have no idea where I'd be without her. Thank you, G! She was called my "Fruit Cart Fairy" but without teeth some things aren't possible right now. We'll get there, I hope.
That's all for now. Please SHARE . That's a big dollar amount, scary big!
I wish everyone safe and Happy Holidays. Don't drink and drive. Maybe volunteer as designated driver? Your friends will love you! (Okay, more than usual!) Take care and be well.

Lori 💕🐺

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Hello dA people!  Yes, I'm back and still singing the same song as you can see above.  I think I was last here in November.  The universe decided that I didn't have enough stress so my healthy 79-year-old father (who had just remarried at 75!) became very ill very fast.  It began as a sore back, which he's had forever thanks to wearing a heavy gun belt throughout his career as a cop.  Within a few days the pain was excruciating, there are no words for the severity.  He was hospitalized and tests showed pulmonary carcinoma with metastases to the thoracic and lumbar spine.  One and a half weeks later he was admitted to hospice care, and 36 days after onset of pain he died.  I was a Daddy's girl.  With no sons I got to learn guns and how to shoot, fishing, all the fun stuff.  I'm still winding my way through this, and it hits when least expected.  Of course the stress made my lupus symptoms go absolutely insane so it's been a pain packed party of one.

The rest of this post is copied from my GoFundMe campaign, today's note.  This time crunch is scaring the hell outta me to be honest.  We go too long and I even up with never having bottom teeth.  I WANT A DAMNED SALAD!  Sorry, I'm crying so I will finish up.  Please, SHARE, wherever you can.  I know I'm not on here a lot, for a long time, but I used to be.  Pain drives my life now.  Here's the note.  (Kinda funny-the options below for reading, watching, drinking...exactly the same again!  It's kinda sad too, I live a very small existence.)

$1500.00!  That's all we need to get the first surgery!  I got a surprise today looking at my bank account and finding a strange deposit.  Seems 15 days ago I received a $200 donation from a really special lady, but I either didn't see or didn't get notified.  It's possible with the loss of my father that I missed it.  But it's here and I'm thrilled!  You people are extraordinary and I thank you for your kindness and generosity.  Please, SHARE this post.  We're cutting it close because the bone loss in the lower jaw is extreme.  These implants must be done before the bone is too far gone.  That terrifies me, because it means that even though I have beautiful lower dentures there's no way I can wear them.  They won't stay in.  Of course there's the bone grafting option.  Yeah.  If I can't raise the total needed for these 2 surgeries ($9,500.00 for top and bottom) then there's no way in hell I could raise the bank busting amount needed for grafting.

So, PLEASE SHARE THIS!  $1500 for surgery #1.  Hugs, take care and be well.

Lori  💕🐺

gofund.me/LoriLife

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REALLY, TODAY'S NOTE IS THE TOP 4 PARAGRAPHS, HONEST!  I INCLUDED THE BACK NOTES JUST IN CASE SOMEONE IS CURIOUS WHAT LUPUS COMBINED WITH SJÖGREN'S CAN DO TO YOU.  YET EVERY SINGLE CASE OF LUPUS IS DIFFERENT.  IT'S A CRUEL DISEASE THAT PISSES OFF DOCTORS BECAUSE THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT IS COMING NEXT AND CAN'T FIX IT.


Hello all!  I could swear that I have been here and updated my journal after what is shown, but I'm just going to accept what it says and apologize.  I think the combination of pain and increased stress levels have led to the memory problems increasing as well.  I hope everyone is doing good.  I'm still not drawing due to muscle spasms and that can make me sad when I come here, because I want to very much.  Yesterday I was trying to reply to a text and I was spazzing so much it looked like I was typing in a foreign language!  Funny, and annoying at the same time.

What I'm doing here is copying updates from my GoFundMe campaign to here.  It will fill you in on what's going on, from yesterday back to May 31st, and I don't have to type much because my hands hurt.  Plus it means that I won't forget things that I included there!  This memory issue is truly upsetting, no matter how much I joke.  Enough of that.

If you wish you can read on for details.  I do ask that you please visit gofund.me/LoriLife and SHARE MY CAMPAIGN, whether you can help or not.  Please SHARE on all of your social media sites.  I'm coming up on what will possibly be a time crunch and could really use the help.  Medicare pays absolutely ZERO for dental work.  I'm single, alone, and am having to use a wheelchair more and more.  Oh, yeah.  A wheelchair, something else Medicare doesn't pay for.

Please, take care everyone.  I keep my sketchbook and pencils right here by my chair, waiting for the day my body doesn't hate me.  Thanks so very much for your help, whether past, future, or simply a SHARE.  It all adds up, and lastly I ask that you throw a good thought out into the world for me.  Hugs, take care and be well.

Lori

Update
Hello everyone, I do hope you're still here with me as it was kind of comforting. Hoping too that everyone is doing well. This is an update. If you do not want to read in full I ASK YOU TO PLEASE SKIP TO BOTTOM. ALSO, PLEASE SHARE THIS ON ALL OF YOUR SITES. Yes, I am asking for more help as we will be starting the next phase. Thank you. -What a game that was! I'm a life-long Cardinal fan and I could not make myself root for the Cubs, even though I live in Illinois. It felt dishonest, or that I would be cheating on the Cardinals! So, I was cheering for the losing team...but it was worth it just watching such an exciting game. -I hope you are all still with me, through all of these delays. I'm having a hard time with them myself, with anxiety and even panic attacks. Trying everything I can think of to find rides on the days that (the amazing & wonderful) Gina couldn't take me with no luck, with more appointments cancelled. I am terrified they're going to cut me from the program! The way appointments work is different, and you are sort of stuck with the days she can get hold of. It's a 5+ hour round trip drive with a 3 hour wait in the middle. The medical transit places don't go that far and I think there's an insurance issue...I asked the place that told me of insurance issues how much if I just paid cash, thinking that I was desperate and it's just a danged ride! I was quoted a price of around $780.00! No typo. I about lost it. Highway robbery? Yeah. I could have taken a limo service for that price! Yes, I checked them too. Guess what? -I have an appointment FRIDAY, NOV. 11th at 9a.m., which means we leave here at 6:15-6:30 a.m. at the latest. AND I NEED A RIDE, WHICH MEANS I HAVE TO THINK OF WHERE ELSE TO CALL AND I'M ALREADY IN A PANIC! -Gina is taking me the 7th & the 28th, where (I doubt with missed appointments) my dentures were to be done and I was to spend the night in a hotel and go in again the next morning for adjustments. -I haven't taken into account that I am now (currently) needing to use a wheelchair when out of the house due to pain, which is kicking my butt lately.. I'm paying TO RENT ONE this month, which means I can't save for my own at $750 or so. BECAUSE MEDICARE WON'T FREAKING PAY! Why? Because I have to need to use it in my home pretty much always. I live in 320 sq. ft., I can reach wall or furniture everywhere, and there's no room to maneuver a wheelchair here! I'm stopping here because I'm upset. And here's the bonus. Once I pay the other half of the denture cost-they don't want it til you pick them up-I WILL HAVE USED THE LAST OF THE FUNDS COLLECTED HERE. Right now I'm admittedly nauseous, as I really didn't want to ask for help the first time. There have been a lot of costs that I hadn't considered. I have had to pay all travel costs, including paying the people who took me, which is only fair. We have also had additional fees that the first student forgot about, extra tests, etc... Please don't panic at this number because it's possible I can get a grant to help, but the surgery and implants could run up to $12,000.00. Yeah. Or it could be ¼ that amount! BUT-THEY WILL NOT BEGIN THE SURGERY UNTIL IT'S PAID FOR, I'm not sure if full amount or partial. Having different people tell you different things is upsetting. Last visit I was told that we don't have to wait to do surgery, which is why I am again asking for your help, and for you to SHARE THIS, please. Once I get my dentures and wear maybe a month or so, then it's a matter of money. DENTURES! TEETH! I have had friends wanting to see me, but I just can't do it. No one has seen me this heavy-oh, I skipped the swelling story!-and that's terrible in itself. Add no teeth? I have never been a vain person. Sweats, t-shirt, rarely wear makeup, and I pull my hair into a ponytail and voilà! I love and miss everyone, and I'm sorry. And I'm done for now. Please, share this post. Take care and be well, everyone.


Update
A day, a month...that pretty much tells you how things are. Dental treatment-wise it's pretty good. The appointments are spread out because they have had mid-terms, finals, and whatever else, so we wait. On 10/19 I go for what I hope is my last border molding on the bottom. These are that gloopy stuff trying to get good impressions of your GUMS, which isn't easy. Then they have to add edges so you get that suction thing that keeps your dentures from flying out-actually, I'm guessing on that but it seems logical! Top is done but having problems with bottom. Why? Because there's quite a bit of bone loss, especially on the far back where I had my wisdom teeth removed at age 19. Which is interesting because the dentist who helped the first student with my initial intake visit and X-rays told me that it would be easy because I had a really good amount of bone left! And they wonder why I get frustrated. In other news...I have retreated from dealing with people for a while now. It's nothing to do with my friends, who are amazing people, (and stuffed animals, Hi Ted!). Unfortunately I have been in truly tremendous amounts of pain, and it can make me not so nice. My friend Gina, without whom I would be lost, told me the other day that I have Pain Tourette's! Gina does my grocery shopping and pretty much everything else, even drives me to my Monday dental appointments on her day off. A big part of the recent pain has been a flare of erythema nodosum. "Flare" is mild. This is an attack like never before. If you look up erythema nodosum it will probably tell you that you get a couple of lumps (nodules=nodosum) on your shin(s) that are red and hot (erythema) and take ibuprofen for the pain, they'll be gone in 3 weeks. Yeah. Me, not so much. They first appeared in my early 20's. They have damaged nerves in my lower legs and my shins, except for the very back, are now hard and solid. The skin is painful to touch. New nodules, like now, try to make room, but the skin doesn't want to stretch anymore because it's hard too. Sweats are the only pants I can tolerate, and there are days and weeks like now when I can't even tolerate my very nice sheets touching them. Think about it, every tiny move day, a month...that pretty much tells you how things are. Dental treatment-wise it's pretty good. The appointments are spread out because they have had mid-terms, finals, and whatever else, so we wait. On 10/19 I go for what I hope is my last border molding on the bottom. These are that gloopy stuff trying to get good impressions of your GUMS, which isn't easy. Then they have to add edges so you get that suction thing that keeps your dentures from flying out-actually, I'm guessing on that but it seems logical! Top is done but having problems with bottom. Why? Because there's quite a bit of bone loss, especially on the far back where I had my wisdom teeth removed at age 19. Which is interesting because the dentist who helped the first student with my initial intake visit and X-rays told me that it would be easy because I had a really good amount of bone left! And they wonder why I get frustrated. In other news...I have retreated from dealing with people for a while now. It's nothing to do with my friends, who are amazing people, (and stuffed animals, Hi Ted!). Unfortunately I have been in truly tremendous amounts of pain, and it can make me not so nice. My friend Gina, without whom I would be lost, told me the other day that I have Pain Tourette's! Gina does my grocery shopping and pretty much everything else, even drives me to my Monday dental appointments on her day off. A big part of the recent pain has been a flare of erythema nodosum. "Flare" is mild. This is an attack like never before. If you look up erythema nodosum it will probably tell you that you get a couple of lumps (nodules=nodosum) on your shin(s) that are red and hot (erythema) and take ibuprofen for the pain, they'll be gone in 3 weeks. Yeah. Me, not so much. They first appeared in my early 20's. They have damaged nerves in my lower legs and my shins, except for the very back, are now hard and solid. The skin is painful to touch. New nodules, like now, try to make room, but the skin doesn't want to stretch anymore because it's hard too. Sweats are the only pants I can tolerate, and there are days and weeks like now when I can't even tolerate my very nice sheets touching them. Think about it, every tiny move of a toe moves something in your calf. Moving on. I have had to face some harsh realities lately including getting a wheelchair for those really bad times. We have a world filled with genius engineers who can put a computer in a chip the size of my fingernail, BUT ask them to design a wheelchair for fat people? Oh, you can get them. They just don't fit through the older smaller doors. Yeah, those doors that ARE EVERYWHERE. What the hell? I'm also trying to find someone who can drive me to my Wednesday dental appointments. I pay $100 to cover gas and time, and all they have to do is drive me, help with walker, read or whatever, then drive home. And I can't find anyone! I have to renew my driver's license (I forgot) and will have to rent a car and drive myself. By the time I get home, with all of those leg muscle and skin movements, I'm lucky to get up to my apartment. I was approved for a homemaker but they can't take me and we had a bunch of problems, so I haven't rescheduled. There's no way I can tolerate someone here 3 times a week at a specific time, when I don't know if I'll be awake then, able to stay awake, in too much pain, and on and on. My life doesn't work with a schedule. I realize this is a big whining rant, but unfortunately it is my life. Oh, I might be able to get the implant surgery soon after I get my dentures-which probably won't be til January thanks to the missed appointment involving expired driver's license and car rental denial. The dentist working with me now says that these 6-7 implants "could" cost up to $12,000.00. (I started to cry a bit, I admit it.) He talked (whispered) to my wonderful student Evelyn to check into the "grant". Neither mentioned it to me but let's hope it involves a huge discount, because it's mandatory that I get these. With current bone loss it's the only way that I will have anything resembling teeth. Unless I can pay for bone grafting, that is. I hope all of your lives are treating you better than mine. I know we're coming into the holiday season too. I will try to remember to let you know when she starts to make my dentures-she does them at home as homework! Luckily she loves making them so they should be very nice. I have to pick out teeth, color, whatever. Please, everyone, take care and be well.


Update
It just erased everything I wrote when I had a muscle spasm. Apologies but I will come back tomorrow or next day, because I don't think you want to read that many swear words in one sitting. Take care, and may I just say POOP! Lori


Update
Oh my! Most sincere apologies, I did a post a while back to update you but for some reason it's not showing. I'm sorry, really, but I am truly starting to believe that technology hates me. This isn't the first sneaky thing that it has done, and I doubt it'll be the last. Okay, the update. July for SIU-E Dental School means they work through the 8th and then have their summer break the rest of the month. I wasn't happy about this because it's just another delay to me. I did put a call in to my new student, can't remember her name right now, to check in. She had tried but calendar was already full, of course. She decided to check again and put me on hold. For a while. She finally came back and...found an open chair 7/6 at 8 a.m. to do the denture molds!! Someone must have just cancelled. AND...proving that she is trying to help me, had me hold so long because she contacted the implant supervisor and he will meet me on 7/6 as well!! We should get all plans in place and costs figured for implant surgery, which means we'll be ahead a visit in August. She will get denture molds done ASAP, because I will wear them first to be sure of fit before the implant surgery, which when completely done will fix dentures in place. So, it's good news! I'm fully healed on the right, and the left has just one little area that isn't tender, but I can tell it needs a little more time. Works perfectly with the schedule we have. I'm just waiting for the day that I have teeth again! I find that when brushing my hair that's all I look at, and when brushing my...mouth...I do it mostly by feel. I'm just thrilled that the lupus didn't interfere with my healing. I wasn't sure about that and more than a little nervous. Okay, that's it. I will make sure this posts. Everyone, please take care and be well. Lori

Update
Yes, it's official. I survived "Lori Has No Teeth Day"! It went pretty well, if somewhat rougher for the dental students and the supervising dentist. The teeth that were left had just been crumbling, and I told them that I would brush and floss (okay, not always floss), and tried to care for my pearly almost-whites. They explained that when Sjögren's is that severe, there really isn't much I could have done. Dry mouth is a tooth killer. I kept Biotene in spray, gel, and liquid forms when I could find them. I ALWAYS had at least one type though. Bedtime was mandatory use, but if I slept through there were hours of dry mouth. Well, at least while I will still use Biotene it won't be causing any tooth worries! My face is9 swollen and I have some pretty bruising. I don't remember the name but I believe it's new, the local anesthetic they used both upper and lower this time, but it worked great! None of the full body shaking like last time with the different stuff they used last time on the top teeth either. The problems came from the broken teeth, some of which the entire tooth was in the gums. The supervising dentist ended up coming in to help because they had to do a lot of drilling to get hold of the teeth and had to cut flaps to reach others. It feels like there are sutures in all 11 extractions. But they're finally gone. The bruising on the outside of my face has more to do with positioning and holding me where they wanted when they wanted. Today is the most the inside has swollen, which I believe is how it did last time. I still haven't looked inside (weenie!) but if like last time it's probably deep purple and blue with bruising. Oh well, doesn't hurt so who cares?! I have no idea why I have experienced little to no pain both times (except my body which is still paying me back for overworking it!), but I am definitely not going to question it. I will let you know when we're scheduled to meet in order to set next procedure date, plan, and cost estimate of the rest of the work. I'm going to do my best to fast track this, because having no teeth is absolutely unbearable for me. Take care and be well.


Update
Greetings and hallucinations! Tomorrow is the big day, June 1, 2016 will hereafter be known as "Lori Has No Teeth Day". I'm just glad we're getting something done. This stop-and-go treatment is making me a little...testy? Yeah, we'll go with that. I have ANOTHER new student! I'm happy about the change because I was right, he was delaying, not charting things, things like my needing implant assisted dentures! Nope! I don't know why I always end up with problems. I spoke with new student by phone and we will get these removed and then set a meeting to get treatment plan and final costs set-until then I won't know where we are standing financially. Of course they're closed the last 2 weeks of July, but since we're just talking I hope to get early July. At 6 weeks my right side is completely healed which is good. I wasn't sure, with the lupus, how that was going to be. New student said that I am her only denture so once molds are done they should go a lot faster...which means she will be given 20 denture cases! Sorry for the pessimism, I just can't seem to have anything work out. A lot of people say that but if I listed everything you would probably offer to mail Xanax and Valium instead of money! Do they even make Valium anymore? "The 1950's housewife's little helper." Okay, gotta go shower. I will post another update soon. Since I have enough trouble speaking now I can only imagine that it's going to be worse. So please drop me a note instead of calling, or you may think I'm drunk when I answer! That's how I sound now, at least. Considering I don't drink...wow, just realized that somewhere along the way I became an incredibly boring person. Don't drink, eat meat, have teeth, leave the house...I think I can be newly classified as a piece of furniture. Crap.

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Thought I had updated, apologies.  This will be quick because I have to finish 2 other things.

Full update at gofund.me/LoriLife - hopefully tomorrow I will do that.  If I remember I will copy here.

Yes, dental school accepted me.  Why am I not jumping up and down?  Well, beside the fact that it would hurt like hell I can't seem to get a straight answer from them.  3/25 we meet to discuss options and costs of options and make our plan.  I was told that I would be assigned a student and would have that student throughout treatment.  Anna was my student.  I called a while back with a question...Erin was now my student.  I called today...Ali was my student.  3 students and I haven't been treated yet!  Whatever.

Okay.  The unbelievable?  I used a new hair product and the next morning my waist length hair was all glued together.  With time and careful untangling I have lost most of the hair on top of my head, and it is terrible. On my webpage you can see a picture of my hair that was nice and thick.  It's not anymore.  Yes I am in contact with the company.  I want a new life, this one is too hard.

More later.

Lori

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